We all accept that the C.I.A. brought down The World Trade Centre towers in order to give themselves something to do after the cold war ended but I think we should take seriously this much more plausible explanation which has been all over the internet ever since I made it up just now. My sources tell me that forensic scientists sifting through the 911 wreckage received orders directly from The White House to suppress the fact that they were finding small wooden blocks, approximately the size of a Biscuit Boost scattered among the debris. What could this possibly mean? This reporter can only draw one logical conclusion.
The events of 911 were the inevitable result of a game of Jenga between George W. Bush and Osama Bin Laden which got massively and tragically out of hand. The two ideologically opposed protagonists first hit upon the idea in the 1970's as a way of settling their differences once and for all, without any innocent people getting hurt(which neither of them could possibly countenance) and so they began to build. What each of them failed to predict however, was the massive resources which the other would be willing to throw at the problem and so the towers began to grow....and grow....and grow and grow some more. All this went unnoticed by native New Yorkers who were used to seeing such structures appearing on their world famous skyline. Indeed some of the more opportunistic members of the business community took it upon themselves to move into the new towers, after all, this was some of the world's most expensive real estate, right in the heart of the Manhattan central business district. How were they to know? Besides, the towers seemed to be unoccupied and they had squatter's rights didn't they?
Well, you can guess the rest. No game of Jenga was ever supposed to go on that long, no Jenga tower supposed to go that high, no one was supposed to get hurt and yet down,down,down they came. The funny thing about the whole situation is that, in all the kerfuffle that followed, nobody can remember which tower was built by George and which was built by Osama so they're both going to start again on the same site. This time my money's on Bush. George W was as drunk as David Cameron on boat race day throughout the construction of the lower levels during the 1970's. This MUST have had an impact on his tower's stability. Surely a sober George Bush can build right up to the heavens and this time it's absolutely certain that nobody will get hurt.
The events of 911 were the inevitable result of a game of Jenga between George W. Bush and Osama Bin Laden which got massively and tragically out of hand. The two ideologically opposed protagonists first hit upon the idea in the 1970's as a way of settling their differences once and for all, without any innocent people getting hurt(which neither of them could possibly countenance) and so they began to build. What each of them failed to predict however, was the massive resources which the other would be willing to throw at the problem and so the towers began to grow....and grow....and grow and grow some more. All this went unnoticed by native New Yorkers who were used to seeing such structures appearing on their world famous skyline. Indeed some of the more opportunistic members of the business community took it upon themselves to move into the new towers, after all, this was some of the world's most expensive real estate, right in the heart of the Manhattan central business district. How were they to know? Besides, the towers seemed to be unoccupied and they had squatter's rights didn't they?
Well, you can guess the rest. No game of Jenga was ever supposed to go on that long, no Jenga tower supposed to go that high, no one was supposed to get hurt and yet down,down,down they came. The funny thing about the whole situation is that, in all the kerfuffle that followed, nobody can remember which tower was built by George and which was built by Osama so they're both going to start again on the same site. This time my money's on Bush. George W was as drunk as David Cameron on boat race day throughout the construction of the lower levels during the 1970's. This MUST have had an impact on his tower's stability. Surely a sober George Bush can build right up to the heavens and this time it's absolutely certain that nobody will get hurt.
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